It’s been one of those anniversaries that started as any normal day.  We woke up, checked our phones, grabbed our coffees, got Stevie ready for the day and then sat down in our kitchen nook at the table for a quick breather.  We were chatting about the regular things married people chat about, when Paul glanced at his phone and went…  awwww! looking at me.

I looked back at him and a light bulb went off — I returned with awww!  It’s our anniversary!  And then we stood up right then and there in the kitchen and hugged and kissed and said I love you!  Thanks for marrying me! And then we sat back down and giggled at what dorks we are and went right back to our routine.

After dropping Stevie off at school, we were supposed to work out, but decided since it was such a special day, we would forego the sore muscles and go for a little walk and talk instead.  We marveled over the last 12 years, and how quickly time has gone.  We looked forward to how many more years we still had to enjoy, as it’s our plan to live to the ripe old age of 112.  We talked about the things we wanted to be better at for each other and ourselves.  And off to work we go.

Each year with Paul gets easier.  Even when we feel the outside pressures of jobs and school and therapy and extreme busy-ness and so much STEVIE… Paul and I just work.  He has been my rock and my never-ending support and always makes me laugh.  Even when we feel disconnected at times, he is easy to come back to.  I don’t know why, but I anticipated marriage would be much more difficult than it actually is.  I’m not saying we’re perfect… or am I?  Haha.

But really, it’s not that it never takes any work, or that we have no areas of our marriage that we could improve upon, but we don’t place any crazy expectations on each other.  We choose to work on ourselves as individuals, so that we can be better together as a whole.  We forgive each other when our shortcomings are in full force.  And the fact that we still enjoy each other’s company, regardless of what we’re doing, says a lot.

As we age, I do miss our younger, carefree selves.  But I feel like we’re still in there somewhere. Sometimes we see glimmers of those cute french-fry lovin’ kids.  And when time and space allows, maybe they will show up more.  Until then, I am so in love with the man I married, along with the man that he has become over the last 20 years that I’ve known him. That handsome face and strong body.  The commitment he made to always take care of us.  His filthy sense of humor.  The grace he offers when I make mistakes.  The space he gives me to figure out who I am and what I want to be when I grow up.  His creativity.  His protection.  His partnership.  The father he is.  All the goodness he has to give.  I don’t know that we have a great romance or a grand love story, but doesn’t that kind of make it the most romantic of all?  The life that we’ve built together is made up of some pretty dang good stuff.

To know Paul is to love him, I just get to love him a little more than everyone else.

Happy 12th Anniversary to my main squeeze.  Let’s hang out soon K?