Merry Christmas from us !!

Christmases with Stevie.  Hm. I’m trying to think how to describe it… They really seem to simultaneously get harder and easier each year. Harder because Stevie knows what he wants and he wants it now. No exceptions. Lots of tantrums, screaming, demanding, and more presents!!!! I know he’s not the only kid pulling these stunts, but it’s not so much that he’s being a brat.  It seems more like it’s the change of routine. Too much going on. He’s overwhelmed. Sugar high and drunk on greed. We have to keep reminding ourselves that he just doesn’t quite understand how it all works yet. But it’s frustrating to the point that I considered canceling Christmas all together. It sometimes doesn’t feel worth the exhaustion and the fights.

He also ended the day by tripping and falling face first into the bed frame. Cut and bruised, but I was glad it wasn’t another tooth, for real.

And then there are the easier parts. Mostly the champagne makes it easier. But also, there are these little moments where Stevie shows his sweet side. He says “thank you!!!” when he’s especially excited about a gift car. He was thrilled to meet Santa. He loved our Christmas tree and Christmas lights. He learned some Christmas carols. So a few of the expectations I had in years’ past that were never fulfilled – things that I, as a parent, felt I was missing out on – are starting to come along.

There are still plenty of Christmas fantasies yet to be played out in real life: making Christmas cookies and watching Christmas movies and taking him on Christmas adventures and seeing his eyes light up because Santa came. But all in due time, I suppose.

This year we had so little time and so many distractions, we may not have had time for the Christmas fantasies to come to life anyway! Besides the move (duh), there was preparing for, hosting, and attending several fun parties, so much shopping, and decorating, and blasting holiday tunes. And it was all just on top of the regularly scheduled programming and therapy sessions.

But this season, in our new house, was especially magical for me. I’ve had no problem settling in or feeling like I’m home.  The weather is unusually cool and that’s been amazing.  Sure there were days that felt tough, but there were also days that I had Christmas spirit rainbows shining out of my ears and eyeballs.

And really, what more could you possibly want?