Well, it’s a sensitive subject for me. And it’s going to be a tough one to overcome as the years go on and the teasing gets crueler. Maybe it’s karma for bugging the girl who sat in front of me in junior high science class. Or call it human nature and something that all kids have to endure.
But I get so bummed when Stevie gets teased by other kids.
It happens to Stevie a lot. Luckily, he doesn’t realize it at all. Yet. I usually watch from a distance to try and let things play out. A lot of times, if parents notice the teasing they will put a stop to it. So I figure that Stevie can be a good learning tool for kids to gain understanding and acceptance.
But today that didn’t happen. We were at the mall petrie dish playground and some bigger kids (probably 7 or 8 years old) had gathered up some of the younger kids to play a rousing game of tag. So children of all ages were running around like lunatics on sugar crack. Totally normal. Stevie was on the slide minding his own business, but really got a kick out of watching those kids run and jump. He had the biggest smile on his face. The kids all took a time out near Stevie so they could come up with their next game plan. One of the younger kids pointed to Stevie and said “How about him?” The ring leader said loudly “That kid is not playing with us. He’s a weirdo!” And the other kids started laughing. Stevie thought he was entertaining them. So he gave his best “HI!” They all looked at each other and started laughing again. The ring leader said, “See?! I told you guys he was really weird!” And a fit of giggles.
Stevie had no idea they were laughing AT him. Bless his heart. But by this point, my heart was on the floor. A bit busted up. And my stomach was in a fury of fire. Rage was arising as I stomped toward the kids. I wanted to grab that little shit by the shirt collar and shake him and yell “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT! HE’S THE MOST WONDERFUL KID IN THE WHOLE WORLD IF YOU GET TO KNOW HIM! AND HE’S BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH! DON’T EVER TALK ABOUT MY SON AGAIN!!!”
Thankfully, I’m not a psycho.
So I said, in my best motherly tone “Please do not make fun of my son. He’s just a little kid. You need to be nice.”
He stared at me with an open mouth. Didn’t say a word. And I could see his eyes shifting toward his sleeping dad. Dad didn’t notice. So I guess he was off the hook for being a dick. But as I sat back down, I could feel the tears rising. This is not the first or last time Stevie will be made fun of. And I know that. And I know I can’t stop it from happening. But in that moment. Dangit. My sweet little boy. He wouldn’t hurt a fly. I felt all the heart pains that he will go through in the years to come. It hit me. All in that moment. And I just ached for him. I wanted to scoop him up and save him from all the meanies of the world.
But instead I said a silent prayer that I will simply know what to do when the time comes that it actually hurts his feelings.
Jaana-You don’t know me, but I worked with Paul and am now addicted to your blog. You are seriously my motherhood role model of the moment. My heart aches at the thought of anyone not seeing how gorgeously special Stevie is. My daughter is only 13 months and I’m already dreading the day she gets made fun of. Ugh. It sucks that we can’t protect our kids from everything. 🙁
Thanks for reading!! So sweet of you to say. And it’s so true – very few kids will be spared the teasing unfortunately. Glad I am not alone in feeling bummed about it!
I am so sorry. This hurts my heart so deeply.
Thanks Heather. xo
Oh sweetie… This makes my heart hurt. I’ve had kids be mean to Jack before and it took everything in me to not cry in front of the other moms… I lost it as soon as I got home. And then when Jack would comment about it WEEKS later, it made me hurt all over again. It’s a good thing our boys are SURROUNDED by people who love them so very much, and will never let them forget it. I love you. And I love Stevie. You’re the best momma ever.
Oh my little buddy Jack! Mean kids really stink! Love will be the answer!! Thanks babe. xoxo
Oh man. That made my heart hurt too. Sounds like you handled it perfectly. Kids are so cruel. All we can do is teach our kids to accept and be kind and hope that it sticks. UGH. Hugs to Stevie (and you lady!) XO
xoxo
Jaana Hokis, you know I haven’t been going on line every day since my surgery. I walk up early this morning and couldn’t go back to sleep so I came down to see my e-mails then I went to your page to see what’s new with my sweet Stevie., my angel! his smile gives me a reason to continue living. From the very beginning, I knew where you were going! my heart almost stopped…. My precious little one; who can tease him? What kind of insensitive inhuman children are being raised into this world? I don’t understand? I wish I was there, I would have found their parents and went straight to them saying to be kind enough to supervise their off-springs and try to take responsibility for their kids action. My poor baby, my hero, my HOKIS he endured so much in his little life that most people wouldn’t have seen in their whole life span!. i’m so proud of you Jaana Hokis. It’s not easy, but we have to be strong…..Love. Bachigs!
I’m proud you didn’t go crazy. I would have. Lol I love it when kids are nice and sweet though, it gives me hope for the years to come.
thanks Liz you are so right. there are the nice and sweet ones out there!!
I would say “do you need me to beat up some kids?” but I’m afraid that would come back to haunt me! 🙂 Remember he’s a warrior! Loves.
i’m getting a “butt-kicking little kids” team together. you’re the captain. hahaha
What a little punk… I could’ve guessed before even reading further that the kid’s parents were probably nowhere to be found. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. This angers me so much, as Tucker has been on the receiving end many times for being different. Ooh – my blood is boiling!
RIGHT?! When I realized how un-involved the dad was, I felt a little bad for the kid and his need for attention. But he still made me mad!
That breaks my heart. I have been that psycho before that you speak of.
hahaha! i swear though. i can only keep my cool so long. it’s gonna come out on the most unsuspecting little sucker!